bitch please

photography: me

so. the party is about three days away.

its going to pretty much be amazing. that is, IF lots of people show up. and from what I've seen and heard. LOTS of people are showing up.

but I know for a fact that none of you guys care. so I'll talk about something more interesting.

boys and clothes and makeup. and sex.

I recently discovered just how clueless girls are when it comes to guys. like seriously. CLUELESS. I mean, I'm no casanova, but jesus. some people's kids. I'm here to forgive you for your sins, and offer you salvation.

#1 never, EVER say you're stupid/dumb/ugly to a guy. not only will this show him that you're nervous in front of him, but it tells him that you want/need/crave attention. and thats not attractive.

#2 um. wear makeup. I don't mean to sound like a catty bitch. but seriously, not a lot. just enough to look more attractive, like make it look natural. unless its late, then you can play it up, but during the day, chill with the lipstick and eyeshadow.

#3 buy burts bee's products, they're natural, and they work. I use the citrus scrub every day after washing my face with thier deep cleansing face wash, and then after the scrub, I use the toner and then lotion. works great. and thier shampoo works really REALLY well. more moisture and super shiny. do it.

#4 do not throw yourself at men. I mean, they should be throwing themselves at us for christs sake. like they should be idolizing us, not the other way around. think about it, we're way more alluring and unique, we have the most beautiful outlook on life, we put more work into looking good for them? fuck that.

#5 listen to better music.