that party

was bad ass.

list of things that happened.

1) my sisters heart got broken, twice

2) emsie broke her collar bone and had to go to the ER before the sun even went down

3) my best friend got stabbed (figuratively) in the back and got her heart broken

4) and I got asked to homecoming.

it was def a party, thats for sure.

here's the pictures to prove it:

bitch please

photography: me

so. the party is about three days away.

its going to pretty much be amazing. that is, IF lots of people show up. and from what I've seen and heard. LOTS of people are showing up.

but I know for a fact that none of you guys care. so I'll talk about something more interesting.

boys and clothes and makeup. and sex.

I recently discovered just how clueless girls are when it comes to guys. like seriously. CLUELESS. I mean, I'm no casanova, but jesus. some people's kids. I'm here to forgive you for your sins, and offer you salvation.

#1 never, EVER say you're stupid/dumb/ugly to a guy. not only will this show him that you're nervous in front of him, but it tells him that you want/need/crave attention. and thats not attractive.

#2 um. wear makeup. I don't mean to sound like a catty bitch. but seriously, not a lot. just enough to look more attractive, like make it look natural. unless its late, then you can play it up, but during the day, chill with the lipstick and eyeshadow.

#3 buy burts bee's products, they're natural, and they work. I use the citrus scrub every day after washing my face with thier deep cleansing face wash, and then after the scrub, I use the toner and then lotion. works great. and thier shampoo works really REALLY well. more moisture and super shiny. do it.

#4 do not throw yourself at men. I mean, they should be throwing themselves at us for christs sake. like they should be idolizing us, not the other way around. think about it, we're way more alluring and unique, we have the most beautiful outlook on life, we put more work into looking good for them? fuck that.

#5 listen to better music.

what not to wear

okay, so I feel like I need to get this out. like this has been bothering me for forever. seriously. its a what not to wear, and what is awesome-to-wear-list you guys. oh em gee.

NOT.

#1 muscle shirts

I don't care if you can rock it, I don't care if you wish you could rock it. Don't fucking wear a muscle shirt. I don't want to see your abs 24/7, I want to see your abs when we go to the pool, or when we have sex. I want it to be a suprise, like "SUPRISE! I'M BEEFY!!" and to all the girls who wear muscle shirts and think they look awesome? YOU DON'T, YOU LOOK LIKE A TRASHY, RED-NECK LITTLE SKANKY BITCH. who could possibly beat me up. BUT PROBABLY NOT. please, just say no.

#2 fishnet

fishnet has to be the skankiest shittiest fakist lamest dumbest ugliest thing ever.

never ever wear this.

#3 wife-beaters in public

do you even know how lazy and gross that makes you look? jesus, you might as well be trying to pick up girls in your pajamas. nasty.

YES.

#1 v-necks

if your not hairy (this applies to most girls and some guys) v-necks are extrely sexy, like I think I have nothing BUT v-necks in my wardrobe. v-necks are amazing. especially from U.O or american apparel

#2 sweaters and button ups

sooo cute! on both girls and guys! like seriously, if I see a guy wearing a legit sweater, I will ask him out. for sure. not really, but I'll probably want to.

#3 glasses

if you can rock 'em, don't sock 'em.

in other words, if you are totally fucking gorgeous with glasses, who's to say you can't wear them! glasses are amazing! go buy a pair now!

overload aka what the hell

photography: http://everyoneisfamous.com/

1. found out homecoming is NEXT MONTH

what the hell, that is NOT enough time for me to woo spencer and make him fall in love with me, I need at least two whole months. at least. whatever. that is lame

2. my phone is officially lost,

what the hell!? and now I need to pay for a new one, along with the party that I'm single-handedly funding with my itty bitty paycheck.

3. derrek won't tell me anything about spencer.

what the hell. what a little back stabbing jerk, just kidding, I love you derrek, but I was counting on you, and you totally let me down. thumbs down on that one.

3. my party is next weekend!?

what the hell!

I feel so busy right now.

i shouldn't even be doing this, I'm much too busy.

but whatever

like oh em gee you guyz, spencer and I are totally instant messaging eachother right now! at this very second! like omfg! lol!

sorry.

this weekend needs to be amazing. I need it to be amazing. I need to get shit done that weekend. like I fucking need to get my party shit figured out.

sorry this post is so boring.

star struck

photo: http://claytes.deviantart.com/

video: http://vimeo.com/4193898

I've been single for about..... eight and a half months.

holy shit. that's a long time.

I'm making a pact right now to get a boyfriend. he's name will be spencer.

he'll be a blond haired, blue eyed babe about my height, who sits with me at lunch, and who talks with me about things that I don't talk about with anyone else. he'll be fresh and new and clean.

yes. he does exist. and yeah, all of the above is true. and yeah, he probably likes me too, otherwise he wouldn't pay any attention to me. and he wouldn't move his geometry book so I could sit next to him, or beg me not to waste money on buying bottled water, or teach me how to make a paper airplane.

but I don't know for sure, and if there's one thing I hate, its being unsure (actually, that's not true, there's a LOT of things I hate more than being unsure, like herpes, I hate herpes way more than I hate being unsure, and the word "cunt" I hate that word so much)

so for now, I'll wait until I catch derrek alone (a mutual friend between spencer and I) and ask him. because derrek can't keep a secret to save his life, one of the many reasons I love him. I know, that's usually a bad thing, but for some reason, it hasn't been a problem with derrek.

anyways, my party is on the 29th. it is (hopefully) going to be HUGE. like planetarily colossally monumentally enormous. a few things on the grocery list? (for the party)

1. about a hundred plus glowsticks

2. tons of silly string

3. strobe lights

4. bitchin'-ness

5. pretzels

so pretty much, its going to kick ass.

unless it's cold.

then that would suck. but oh well, I think everyone will warm up with all the dancing they're gonna be doing. for real.

Nightlife from Nicolaug2k on Vimeo.